So now the pearl-clutching brigade wants to lecture everyone about national security and proper government conduct—how quaint. Democrats and their media mouthpieces are in full meltdown mode over a Signal chat used by Trump officials and allies, waving their arms like the Republic just fell because someone dared to use a messaging app.
Meanwhile, they’d like us all to forget the actual, deadly national security disaster that was the Biden administration’s exit from Afghanistan. You remember that one, right? Thirteen dead American service members. A botched drone strike that killed an innocent aid worker and seven children. And not a single Democrat demanded accountability. Not one resignation. Not even a half-hearted, faux-sincere press conference to apologize.
But sure, let’s all pretend that Pete Hegseth participating in a group chat is the thing that should bring the republic to its knees.
Naturally, Adam Schiff—everyone’s favorite conspiracy theorist with a congressional pin—decided to pop up and weigh in, taking the opportunity to flex his moral superiority. Which, given his history, is a bit like getting life advice from a guy on his fourth bankruptcy. Schiff, who spent years selling the Russia hoax to the American public with all the enthusiasm of a QVC host pushing cubic zirconia, now wants to scold people for supposedly “improper” use of government communication channels.
REP FALLON: “In 2020, NPR branded Hunter Biden’s laptop story a ‘waste of time.’ Do you know how many times NPR interviewed Adam Schiff about the Russia Collusion hoax?”
NPR CEO: “Idk.”
REP FALLON: “25 times. How many times did NPR interview Chairman Comer about the Biden… pic.twitter.com/EoOGHAZrPW
— KanekoaTheGreat (@KanekoaTheGreat) March 26, 2025
Except, of course, he left out a few teeny-tiny details. Like the fact that the “chat scandal” that has Democrats foaming at the mouth didn’t involve plotting coups or leaking intelligence. No, it involved actual government employees using a secure platform to swap notes on—you’re not going to believe this—transgender surgeries.
Yes, taxpayer-funded intelligence personnel were trading blow-by-blow updates on penis removal, laser hair removal in extremely sensitive areas, and post-castration pleasure. Nothing says national readiness like debating estrogen injections while you’re supposed to be assessing threats from China or Iran.
One Defense Intelligence Agency employee apparently found time during the workday to reflect on the “euphoria” of peeing without needing to aim. Another boasted about how genital reconstruction allowed for more confident bikini wear. Someone else helpfully added that getting their, well, rear-end zapped by lasers was “shocking.” I mean, talk about mission readiness. These people are supposed to be America’s eyes and ears on the global stage, and they’re out here using government resources to crowdsource hormone advice like it’s Reddit.
So when Schiff pretends this was some kind of civil liberties abuse or bigoted crackdown, one has to wonder: is this the hill he wants to die on? Is he seriously arguing that firing people for discussing their surgical castration and personal sexual habits on a government platform was the wrong move?
🚨BREAKING: Kash Patel says: “FBI investigation uncovers 256 emails between Adam Schiff and Jeffrey Epstein. This is a massive scandal, and Schiff must be held accountable.”
Do you support a full investigation?
YES or NO? pic.twitter.com/guHA9JCLt0
— Tucker Carlson News (@TuckerCNews) March 26, 2025
And just in case that wasn’t tone-deaf enough, let’s not forget the source here. Schiff is the guy who spent years insisting there was “evidence in plain sight” that Trump colluded with Russia. Spoiler alert: there wasn’t. The Mueller report didn’t give him the smoking gun he promised. The Durham report shredded the DOJ’s handling of the investigation. But Schiff still got a book deal and a cable news tour out of it. Accountability? Please. The man wouldn’t recognize it if it voted for him.
Now, are there some legitimate critiques to be made here from the right? Sure. NSA Michael Waltz adding Jeffrey Goldberg to a secure chat group was not the brightest move. Whether Waltz did it himself or one of his staffers made the call, it’s a flub that deserves scrutiny. But criticism from within the ranks of the right comes with credibility. Schiff and his crew, on the other hand, are standing on a mountain of failures, waving a flag of hypocrisy, and pretending they’re the adults in the room.
Gold Star families who lost everything due to the Biden administration’s incompetence never got justice, never got closure, and certainly never got the same breathless media outrage. But a Trump-world group chat? Now that’s the scandal worth their time. Give us a break.
