Oh, Kathy Griffin is back at it again, folks—this time warning us all that Donald Trump if re-elected, will apparently spend his second term going after… comedians. Yes, you read that right. According to Griffin, Trump’s grand plan isn’t about fixing the economy, addressing inflation, or dealing with China—it’s all about hunting down stand-up comics like a deranged comedy club bouncer.
Griffin, who’s still clinging to that infamous 2017 stunt where she held up a fake decapitated head of Trump (classy, right?), is absolutely convinced Trump has a hit list, and she’s somewhere near the bottom of it. I mean, how much more self-important can you get? She literally told Entertainment Weekly that Trump “lives for this” and that he’s going to be knocking comedians down like bowling pins. Because, obviously, when Trump’s not busy with global diplomacy, his top priority is chasing after the D-list.
“He’s going to pick us off, one by one, like bowling pins, and I’m not kidding and I’m not being paranoid,” the celeb told Entertainment Weekly.
“I’m a D-lister, he’s not going to get to me on day one, but he’ll get to me, trust me,” Griffin continued. “He’s got a list. I’ve known this guy for 25 years, maybe 30. He’s so petty that he lives for this. He doesn’t want to be President or do any president-ing.”
Oh, but don’t worry—Kathy is well aware that she won’t be his “day one” target. Apparently, Trump is going to start with the “big fish” like Jimmy Kimmel and Jon Stewart, but eventually, he’ll get around to Rosie O’Donnell (because, you know, that feud never gets old) and, eventually, poor Kathy. I mean, the woman honestly thinks Trump has the time and energy to hold daily press conferences about silencing comedians. Really?
Kathy Griffin claims that Trump will target comedians in second term: ‘Going to pick us off, one-by-one’ https://t.co/1tfTNWoHBV #FoxNews @kathygriffin Kathy, you have nothing to worry about since according to your prediction – comedians will be targeted.
— MikeNoLastName (@MikeOfMosesLake) September 13, 2024
And let’s not forget the “chilling” investigation she claims nearly landed her in jail for that severed head stunt. Apparently, she was almost arrested for conspiracy to assassinate the President. Yeah, because that’s what Trump really thought when he saw her holding his fake head—an actual threat to his life, not just another desperate cry for attention. But hey, Griffin spun that backlash into a whole tour—“My Life on the PTSD List.” How fitting.
Griffin’s photographer buddy, Tyler Shields, even jumped in to remind us how committed Kathy was to her art, saying she was totally fine with going to jail over the head stunt. Oh yeah, real martyrdom there, Kathy. Nothing screams “freedom of speech” like an attention-grabbing, tasteless photo shoot that, let’s be honest, most people have already forgotten about. But here she is, years later, still milking it for every last drop of relevance.
And then there’s her “apology,” which, let’s be real, seemed more about losing social media followers than any actual remorse. Sorry, Kathy, but the “woe is me” routine is wearing thin. Maybe Trump isn’t the one obsessed with holding grudges—maybe it’s you who can’t seem to let things go.
